Natal Saturn Square Midheaven ~ Attacks of Loneliness
Saturn rules our conditioning or the way we were taught and brought up in the world. It is associated with restriction and limitation but with this it brings structure and meaning to the world and our lives. It reminds us of our boundaries, responsibilities and commitments. It is often associated with a father or authority figures. Saturns lessons actually help us to grow. In you chart the position of Saturn reveals you limitations, fears and sense of responsibility.
Saturn Square Midheaven
You will have to learn how to co-operate and how to establish emotional bonds with others. While you are young, especially, you may feel that other people get in the way of what you want to do and resist your efforts. Consequently you may withdraw and cut yourself off from others, or you may feel that they have withdrawn from you. Often you feel that you are very much alone and that no-one really cares about you. This is not usually true, but by withdrawing emotionally, you have made it impossible for them to feel affection for you. It is also possible that you are surrounded by people who are not very friendly. Perhaps it is your own family that seems to judge you harshly or make too many demands, but you can still go out into the world and find people who are willing to be your friends. But for your future it is important not to simply retreat into yourself, because when you are older, it will be harder to meet people and establish connections, unless you learn the habit now. And later on, your attacks of loneliness will be much more severe. In addition, when you are older, inadequate contact with others could lead you to feel empty and meaningless. These feelings could emerge even if you are highly regarded by others, because they arise from your own sense of distance from people. In any case, you may be more of a loner than most, which is perfectly all right within reason. if you have only a few friends, those you do have may be close and enduring.
This time will be very challenging for you and it is important to focus on what you want from life. You may feel like there is an alienation crisis where you are being cut off from everyone and this could make you feel quite lonely. Fears of inadequacy will distort your perspective. It is important to examine your goals and decide what direction is most important for you in the next phase of your life. You may feel as if your heart is not in the right place it is the time to change things. This is also true with your personal relationships, if your heart is not there it is best to break it off. You need to find a balance between our personal relationships and your own personal advancement